Dreams

This is about a 12 month now I have been in this phase of building and learning with my writing  – I noticed right from the start of 2016 that my Mentors were changing in terms of their ability to influence me – this was largely because I wasn’t in their demographic long term – their loss – but also because some of the ‘courses’ AKA Face Book groups of  other student clients initially disappointed me and then I realised that these people were great reciprocal beta testers and had a huge knowledge of diverse ‘stuff’ – I may even re join a couple of these as they time out – but if I do it won’t be for the fronting personality input as there is none.

An excellent resource I still use is Darren Rowse site Pro Blogger, I am still a member of my original online writing and crit group Write Words and use that several times a day if I can. I still take Writing Magazine once a month – and read it.

I am very active on Holly Lisle’s sites and I go through and re go through any of her courses all the time with my WIPs – I don’t imagine that will change – she is dynamic and the site reflects her energy and force of will against some heavy odds – and the other students and moderator students are a hugely talented  international bunch who are at various stages of their writing careers.

New influencers though are moving away from the ‘how to in 10 easy steps’ brigade and I am noticing I am running with a bitch pack by and large – and a clever bunch of women they are too – Holly obviously, but Liz Gilbert, Joanna Penn and Orna Ross are featuring strongly as my ‘go tos’ – I suppose I have been looking at  the ‘how’ and thinking about the ‘why’ in a very practical manner – rather like I approached my career in farming – head down and boots dug in – I expect there are those who might say I ride my horses much the same.

The Parelli gang, Kelly Marks and Monty Roberts remain inspirational and have undoubtedly changed the horse world for the better – including my part of it.

I would always have said – in the past – that the only creative thing I did was cook. I some how missed the point that farm, orchard, gardens both veg and flower are creative in their essence and productive at their core, that forming relationships with livestock, horses and dogs – being self employed full stop –  also requires a subtle open creativity to get to a place where harmony exists and symbiosis occurs. I am suddenly realising that my writing is creative – it may seem laughable that to me it wasn’t an art but a job but then I am often accused of taking things too seriously by those who don’t look twice at me where as those who do a double take see the humour in that fact.

It has been a fight to get myself to lighten up – not hold the reins if you like – and use all of me to get where I want to go. Accepting that I am as creative a other members of my family despite not having applied myself to learning to knit etc is a revelation and though I still feel I am a student I am starting to see the blank page as a blank canvas and admit I want to paint all over it with words that come out of me.

Seeing the farm – as stockless as it is now – ought to be driving me nuts – scruffy unproductive grass etc – instead I see new shapes and textures, colours and movement – I see the wild life much more clearly – the deer, the small hedgerow birds and the hawks and buzzards, the fox and squirrels.

I am not sporting a floaty frock nor espadrilles – it is still jeans and boots -and if I occasionally wear a big straw hat with scarves on the crown? Well I wore it before I discovered I was Creative!

I am a dreamer of sorts – I dream of learning to get this right so I can get out of my own way and write adventures to go on – just like I dream of getting out of my horses’ way and  riding off to adventures with them. – for both I need to find a flow of ideas and action that come together to create and produce. – as ever that means Work In Progress or Please Pass Wide, Slow – and Smiling Quietly 🙂