Only on day two of that – struggling a bit with the slow progress I am making – was reminded it is three years since I was on a friend’s fishing boat when researching a Viking Time Shifty YA I had the hots for – hasn’t made it off the note pad as I directed my focus at my most finished stories and designing this site etc – THREE YEARS? Still none of the work is done – yet I work most week days way longer than 8 hour days, don’t garden, sold my sheep, gave up off farm contracting, and rarely ride my horses and the physical strength , fitness and health is disappearing… will it be THIS year? No earliest I can get HO out there/ up here is next Spring and The Quest series could start going out the following Autumn and that is if we get the house rebuild finished and I don’t stop working at the rate I am – beggars the question why? Why am I doing this?
I look back and I can see how far I have come since I doodled to stop my self going nuts here alone on the farm, I can see where I got my focus and went for it – but now it feels as if those goal posts are moving – I move faster, work longer hours, have started talking a different language than my friends and family and my previous life is ‘another land’ – on another planet.
So wondering if I live my life in an alternative universe now ? No I am not wondering – I KNOW I do. 🙂
So do I know why I do this? No I just do it is overwhelming – I just do it.
If it is overwhelming why do I keep doing it? I don’t seem to able able to stop.
Proving a point? Not so much – no one says to my face that they think I can’t do it – though I debate the opportunity cost of spending my life on this suddenly rather narrow, stony goat track- just to see what is on the other side of the mountain range of my imagination – I don’t doubt that one day a finished book or more will be able to be down loaded from this site and others – free or For Sale.
It’s the ‘one day’ bit that could do with being ‘that day’ ‘this day’ ‘today’ – can only re make date and aim for it baring in mind that I don’t want to miss my life staring at a screen and that S..t Happens. 🙂
I am lucky to have only such small problems and really ‘this Old Goat is not for turning’ so I will pick my way onward while I still can. 🙂 When I can’t then I will do something else.:)
Scrivener is going mobile – Yippee!
Drew out a WIP/Body Of Work/ Catalogue Of Work To Do to try to give my self an overview of My Big Plan So Far…
When I looked at what I have already written – some finished first draft and some a few ideas and a rough plot but something tangible on each I cheered up as I am in the learning phase now – what takes me a long time now will speed up and each achievement will in it’s self teach and enrich the next – also in having a Big Plan – WHEN I get the first thing live and flapping – I can let it go and move to the next and can hope to avoid the dreaded ‘Now what?’
Scrivener App arrived – and that mean’t an opp to re try Dragon – which I have rechristened Nuisance Software Dragon Elsewhere. I am not complaining – I can’t imagine the hours that go into making soft wares like these that folk are screaming for – in my case my Dorset accent provides more than a few howls and howlers – Oooo and Arrrr 🙂